
There is nothing more heartbreaking than wanting to open your mouth when you can't.
Today was a great day though. Some days are better than others, and today was one of them. There is nothing more beautiful than seeing other people happy. I loved today.
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Someone thought this would be charming; to make a sitting area in the lobby of a building where only eight people live and where no one really has any visitors. And if they did have visitors, they wouldn't sit and wait in this weird hallway. They'd just come upstairs. Or wait outside.
Putting the chair and table there makes everything sad and lonely. As if someone should be there, but they're not. Without the chair and table, this was just a few yards of space I walked through to get to my apartment. Now, it's a painful reminder of how devastatingly empty my life is.
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I went to Safeway looking for Viennetta, but instead found this brazen instance of copycatting. How can Nabisco think they can get away with this? If I were Mother's (or Kellogg's, the distributor), I'd be...devastated.
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Maybe you've seen these. If you're lucky, you haven't. Most grocery stores have "buffets" now. How long was that macaroni and cheese sitting out? Being kept warm by, uhh, lights, I guess. The other stuff, some kind of chicken and some kind of olives, didn't offend me due to the lack of coagulation. And the lack of cheese. What kind of health code violations do you see here? If you're stupid enough to actually serve yourself something like this, don't you then deserve whatever kind of food poisoning or upset stomach you end up with?
All this, and I still couldn't find any Viennetta.
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The worst kind of food of all foods, however, are raisins. Worthless, arrogant raisins. "Fitness Award"? You weren't good enough to be grapes, so don't flatter yourself.
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Saw this lone stalk of broccoli discarded atop a pile of beef, and it reminded me of how throughout my childhood and even today during my adulthood I have always struggled to make friends and to fit in with people.
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It occurred to me (as I'm sure it has to others) while using the self checkout machine that I could very easily pretend to scan one of my items and then toss it in my bag without paying for it. Even if I were caught, I could say, "What? I was sure I scanned it??! I'm so embarrassed!" And half of that statement would actually be true.
But no, I paid for everything. I couldn't find any Viennetta, though. Breyer's stopped making it in the 90s, and if you want it now, you'll have to go to a specialty bakery or just go to a Baskin Robbins and get an ice cream cake, really.
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Safeway sells books. Dollar books. The Way Things Ought To Be. Who is he to say how things ought to be? I'm not sure enough of anything to say how things ought to be for me, much less anyone else.
Don't try to dictate other people's happiness. Let them find it on their own. There is nothing more beautiful than seeing other people happy.

2 comments:
I wish I could dictate your happiness. You're young, not an un-goodlooking guy, and living in San Francisco when a lot of us struggle to find happiness in the red-state sticks. As Patsy would say: "Ah geez Eddie, tighten up!"
"I could very easily pretend to scan one of my items and then toss it in my bag without paying for it"
The bags sit on a platform that is a scale. These machines can tell if the things going into the bags match the weights of the things scanned.
Sorry for the pedantic comment. I couldn't help it.
Not being able to contain my superficiality, I just thought of a use for that nasty stuff under the lights. A bandit can buy x pounds of that stuff and x pounds of pine nuts. Then, the nasty stuff is scanned and dropped behind the bagging area, while the unscanned nuts go in the bag.
Thinking of interesting ways to be a criminal is very unsatisfying. Presumably you'll find that creating an interesting blog has the opposite effect. Time will tell.
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